Morning Pages
Yesterday started as an alarming morning with news of the accident in Australia that involved friends of mine. The anxiety of this carried through the day (I’m sure for many people), though eventually the consensus was that everyone would be ok. I won't speak details because they are not my details to share, but I felt reassured that it was going to be alright. I'm sure the outpouring of love and support helped. There are good humans out there.
So what's going on this morning? I sit in our living room at a long green table thinking about the day ahead and typing to you. I have now started to wake up with my daughter at 6am to get a jump on the day together. Morning rituals, pages, breakfasts. It has been working out so far to be getting up this early. To be honest, I could probably do with waking up at 5:30, but I won't tell her that yet. I'd have to start getting to sleep a little earlier if I wanted to pull that off. Completely possible though.
These are stormy times around the world. I'm sure I don't need to quote specifics, but there seems to be an obvious rise in anxiety and fatigue, caused by our daily world news and doses of toxicity (dig for the light!).
And what are we supposed to do in times like these? What keeps us grounded, calm, and going forward? What are some of the tricks you use? I am constantly taking a step back from things and putting things into context and perspective and that seems to help. I'm always trying to look at the bigger picture these days. Pouring myself into things I love to do also seems to help, though at times it can be very difficult to quiet the noise. But noise is needed sometimes, and growth is painful. I feel like we are all going through a time of growth. I can point back to the conflict we face in the world as evidence of change and movement. It is a real act of prestidigitation to be able to wake up firmly in the morning with feet planted to the ground and breathe, open to receive the challenges and information that comes our way. It is an even stronger magical act to be able to retain a sense of optimism and hope. I admire those that can pull this off, though at the same time I deeply sympathize with those who cannot.
I am currently reading The Neverending Story, by Michael Ende, to Bandit at bedtime,. It is one of the best books I have read. I am certainly nostalgic for, and fond of, the movie, but as usual, the book is a completely different experience that goes much deeper than the film. There is a chapter in the book where Atreyu faces Gmork, the werewolf, that moved me incredibly. The scene is slightly different in the movie-- I believe they were trying to distill the chapter into a dramatic and brief "face-off" scene, but in the book it is much more life-altering. Gmork talks about darkness, about the lies we can become, how when people stop believing you change into something you barely recognize. Gmork is pure darkness, but also completely necessary. He knows exactly what he is, and what job he is meant to perform, and he plays this part truthfully and poetically. It is one of the darkest passages I have ever read in a book, and it dares you to find hope in it. Hope comes from the reader in this case, both holding the book in the real world, and in the fictional one. I have not finished the book yet, but from what I have read so far I strongly recommend it, and I'd love to know what you think about the chapter I am describing. It should be a little bit before the halfway mark.
So, much more writing today. I am (roughly) on schedule with things, though I always feel like my head is just above water-- I think that is the nature of working under deadlines and making monthly comics.
And there are going to be a lot of these things coming out, by wonderful teams that have taken the reigns and with my fingerprints on them as well. As a reader, it would be a bit to keep up with, four books a month, but in my opinion (and of course this would be my opinion) totally worth it. But that is the journey. It can be exciting to get the first issue of something, though a little more challenging to continue, and in some cases people will wait for the collections. With the books on Young Animal, I strongly feel that the best way to read them is in the prescribed monthly doses. This is because I learned something about comics, especially ones I believe to be good-- they are a timestamp, a diary. Years later, when I look back at our run of Doom Patrol, I will remember exactly what was going on in my life during each issue. You can't help but put almost 100% of your true life experience into these books-- there is almost nowhere else the material will come from when you have to produce a book a month. Sure, the real life is masked and caped, hidden in action, in conversation and caption at times, but it is really in there. You are truly baring yourself. The same can easily be said about music, and it is definitely true, but music (for the most part) doesn't come out on a monthly basis from most artists. I think episodic things, by nature, must be yanked from the soul steadily and on time.
I'll try and stay on top of my morning pages. They are good for me, though difficult to do while travelling and travel-working, especially if there are other things you need to write while balancing other duties being away from home.
You get into a rhythm though if you stick to morning pages, and I feel they start to get better over time, you get in a groove-- and to me, that is writing. Working the muscle, getting in a groove, locking into step, keeping the brain healthy, and most importantly, sharing constantly.
I'll try and share more. Be safe, have a wonderful day if possible, try and take a moment for yourself, or to give someone a compliment, or both. Try and make something but also try and get through things. I'll be here, doing my thing, working toward the rhythm of the beats and the flow of ideas.
Lots of love,
G